I'm awful at updating...

and yet I have so much to say. Go figure.

Hugs and Loves,
Mim.

Whew; what a summer! And now I'm back in the great state of Kansas after spending a few weeks out east. It was nice having a great job this summer and knowing that when I came back to KS I would start the last year of my degree. I can't believe that after all these years I will finally have my PhD come May. Then what, real life? Oh goodness...I'm not sure if I'm ready to commit.

I met many great people this summer and one in particular. We're dealing with long distance at this point and I'm planning a visit next month. I can't wait to be close again...even if just for 4-5 days. :)

School is intense this semester...comps are around the corner (also in about a month), which is daunting. There's so much to memorize and spit up when the time comes. Add a recital a month behind that, and yeah, you've got a glimpse into my Fall 2010. It's both thrilling and terrifying, and regardless of how much I prepare, time continues to advance at its rate. I either hop on for the ride or fail. I guess it's time to handle my shit.

Hugs and loves.
Mim

Pearl of Wisdom...

Oh trashy tv...you teach me so much.

"You don't need an invitation to your own life."

Lovely.

little things...

I find it amazing that with all the exotic flavors and tastes out there, that a slice of wheat bread and butter can taste so good.

That's all.

Life updates...

Hi all, and to all, I suppose I mean my one follower. Hi Katie!

I have moved from Lawrence, KS, for the summer to upstate New York. I love this area of the United States. It's a slower pace from the hustle and bustle of academia, and the hours in the day seem to tick by slower. I feel like I can get so much more accomplished in one day here than I can in an entire week back home.

I'm working here this summer in the arts, and am looking forward to spending 14 weeks in one of my favorite locations: Schroon Lake, NY. Go ahead, mapquest it. I'll wait. It's a small town in the mountains that thrives off of tourism, and wouldn't you know it, music is everywhere here.

A quick Grandma update: she fell due to an awful gust of wind snatching the porch door (and her with it) on Easter night. Since then she has been in the hospital and then a nursing home to build enough strength to be placed in a rehabilitation center. We have been worried about a small bleed in her brain due to the fall, and then her irregular heart rhythms. I think if she had not had a pacemaker, we would have lost her weeks ago. It has kept her heart beating enough to let her sleep and build her strength. I feel bad leaving her like this and running off to NY for the summer, but at the same time I couldn't pass up this financial opportunity. Isn't it strange this awful guilt we artists feel when we finally get a little bit of a break, and then have to weigh it against the emotional needs of family life. Life doesn't seem fair at times. She is in rehab now and they are working her daily in both occupational and physical therapy, and spending some time working with speech therapy. Hopefully she's able to get back to her independent way of life.

My family and I went to NYC this weekend. Being from the midwest, it was quite the culture shock for them, and they kept their freakouts down to only one. Other than that I kept them busy with a double-decker bus tour of the city since they are both in their upper 50s, and the thought of walking city blocks made me nervous for them. All in all it was a nice time. A bit overwhelming feeling like I had to walk at a slow pace to make sure I didn't lose them, but I'm glad I got to experience this with them because I hadn't been on a family vacation in quite some time.

I hope you are doing well, Katie! ;)
hugs.

Taking flight...

So on Easter evening my grandmother took a trip....literally. She went to open a screen door and the wind caught it--thus flying her out with the door and she smacked into the concrete ground. Her outlook was dim and I was called to the hospital back home. She's dealing with some internal bleeding, a broken nose, and an unrecognizable face. I feel awful for her. I walked in the room and got a "You look great" through swollen eyes. I responded with "Aw, you look ...great...too." "Liar" she said. I love my grandma. Her prognosis improved yesterday and I think she's going to pull through, despite looking like a character out of Return of the Mummy 2.

All of this while I'm trying to make sure I have the opera memorized next week. It brought to my attention, yet again, the pull between family and singing. It's hard when you are a lead character in an opera with no understudy. When emergencies happen you don't know what to do. When there are several people in the cast plus instrumentalists involved, which way do you turn. The same happened on Easter morning. This was the first year that I didn't go home for the holiday. It felt strange. Easter lunch at a bar in Topeka didn't really equate to a homemade Easter dinner with the family. I think this pull is something that many musicians and artists feel. Holiday seasons are typically our busiest times, and many times, our families don't understand why we say we can't make it home.

I'm glad I went home yesterday and was there to help Grandma take her first few bites of "real" food--jello. It felt like an odd circle of life moment.

Observing...

It makes me frustrated to watch people I care about spiral into self-abusive patterns. I realize there may be emotional, physical, and mental scars that make them consistently do things that hurt themselves and the loved ones around them, but eventually I wonder what is the fine line of me watching from a distance (thus not getting involved) and me trying to control them.

That's not to say I don't have my own issues, and my own destructive behavior (ahem, fancy cheeses and not exercising), but these tend to not endanger my friends and loved ones. I really hope my friends are able to get a handle on these situations (benefiting their emotional state and their intended careers. But if not, I will continue to sit back with my cheese bites.